A TRUE HERO

“Sacrificing your happiness for the happiness of the one you love is, by far, the truest type of love.”

Frank Havens

I read this story back in August 2001 in Dr. James Dobson’s Focus on the Family bulletin. I believe that some of the best lessons about life can be learned from the experiences of others.

My question for you as you read this is: Was Bill crazy for passing up a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to participate in the Olympics? Would you or I have the courage to make the same decision?

One of the most powerful stories in the history of the Olympic Games involved a canoeing specialist named Bill Havens. He was a shoo-in, I’m told, to win a gold medal in the 1924 Olympics in Paris.

But several months before the games were held, he learned that his wife would likely give birth to their first child while he was away. She told him that she could make it on her own, but this was a milestone Bill just didn’t want to miss. So he shocked everyone and stayed home. Bill greeted his son, Frank, on August 1, 1924. Though he always wondered what might have been, he said he never regretted his decision.

Well, he poured his life into that little lad and shared with him a love for the rapids. Twenty-eight years passed, and the Olympic Games were held in Helsinki, Finland. This time Frank Havens was chosen to compete in the canoeing event. The day after the competition, Bill received a telegram from his son that read: “Dear Dad, Thanks for waiting around for me to be born in 1924. I’m coming home with the gold medal that you should have won.” It was signed, “Your loving son, Frank.”

Many would question Bill Havens’ decision to miss his big opportunity in Paris, but he wanted his family to know that they always came first, no matter what. And that made him a hero to a little boy named Frank.

Who or what are we living for today? Is it for the accolades given us by others or growing the relationships of those closest to us?

I challenge us today to make decisions based on relationships and becoming men and women of substance. Live today with purpose and intentionality and may all of our decisions in life come from a place of purity and love.

QUESTION: Do you have a loved one who sacrificed for you? Please share in the comments below.

I'M TIRED...

"Simply be who you are, do what you do best, be where you are called by joy, and let life work its magic on your behalf."
~Alan Cohen

 Rays of Hope by Zoomion

I’ve been thinking a lot about my blog and the direction of my blog. Over the past couple of weeks I’ve teetered on the edge of ending my blog or at least greatly reducing my number of posts. I must say that I was nudged by two recent blog posts that I read. One was by Dave Hearn (http://bit.ly/p3EOCB) and the other by Tony J. Alicea (http://bit.ly/q5UxYE).

The reason? I’m tired.

I’m tired of stealing time away from my wife at night when I’m writing a blog. I waited 37 years to get married and I’m not willing to let a blog steal time from Aimie.

I’m tired of stealing time away from my relationship with God. Since I began blogging in April, I’ve spent every morning reading and commenting on blog posts. Before blogging, I had a fairly rich devotional time with God each morning. I’m tired of putting God second to a blog.

I’m tired of acting like I know what I’m talking about. I realize that most of the things that I write about I struggle with myself (although I believe they are true). Sometimes I feel so hypocritical to write about intentional living when I feel, at times, that I lack direction for myself.

I’m tired of opening my Google Reader each morning and seeing 38 unread posts. It’s too much.

I’m tired of feeling the pressure to comment on other people’s blogs to drive people to my blog.

I’m tired of reading all the blogs that tell you how to grow your blog and monetize it. Do these sound familiar?

• Give a list of 3-5 things (i.e. 3 ways to become a better listener). When I read other blogs and they give a list of things, even if they make sense, I don’t remember them. 
• Use the right words in your blog title that optimizes your blog for search engines. 
• Give away free content.

I know these things are all true, but I’m tired of worrying about doing what everyone else tells me to do to grow my blog.

So, my plan going forward is to narrow my focus. I’m eliminating most of the blogs that I’ve been reading from my Google Reader. Below are the exceptions. These people have become blogging friends and I will continue to support their blog and hope they will continue to support mine. One of the greatest rewards from writing a blog has been the other bloggers that I have met. These are genuine, honest, Godly men who have a heart for God and others. You should be reading these blogs:

Arny’s Blog – The Analogous Truth - http://arnyslight.wordpress.com/ 
Brandon’s Blog – Big B - http://bigb94.wordpress.com/ 
Randy Cantrell – Bula Network - http://bulanetwork.com/ 
Cathy Family Blog - http://www.cathyfamily.com/ 
David Santistevan - http://www.davidsantistevan.com/ 
Jeff Goins - http://goinswriter.com/
Jon Stolpe – Stretched - http://jonstolpe.wordpress.com/ 
Ryan Haack - http://www.ryanhaack.com/ 
Tony J. Alicea - http://www.tonyjalicea.com/ 
Dave Hearn - Warrior Shepard - http://warriorshepherd.com/blog/ 

Other good blogs:

Don Miller - http://donmilleris.com/ 
Jon Acuff - http://www.jonacuff.com/blog/
Michael Hyatt - http://michaelhyatt.com/ 
 
I thank those of you who read my blog regularly. There are days when I’m surprised by the number of page hits that I have. Other days, of course, I’m disappointed by the lack of readers.

As I’ve previously stated, the main beneficiary of the blog has been myself. I want to record my thoughts for my future self and a blog is a great way to do so.

So, moving forward, I will likely blog a bit less and I will definitely try to write more about what I know. I still want my blog to surround the idea of intentional living, but maybe I’ll write more about my attempts at intentional living.

I want to be genuine and sincere and if my readership and “tribe” grows, then great. If it doesn’t, then I just know to move in a different direction.

In the meantime, I look forward to more interactions with my blogging friends and meeting new people along the journey.

QUESTION: What are you tired of? Please post comments below.

OUTSIDE ASSESSMENTS

"Life isn't about finding yourself.
Life is about creating yourself."
- George Bernard Shaw

Girona Puente Eiffel by Jose Louis Mieza

The story goes that there were two friends hiking in the woods when they came across a huge grizzly bear. The bear reared up on its hind legs and let out a loud roar when it saw the men approaching. One of the men casually sat down, took off his hiking boots and put on his running shoes. His friend looked at him and said, "Are you crazy? You can't outrun that bear."

"I don't have to outrun the bear," his friend replied. "I only have to outrun you!"

This week, we have been learning about becoming a bucket-filler, focusing on our strengths, and assessing our strengths. Today, I want to share with you one of the most fun assessment activities that I have ever participated in - having others assess your strengths.

We are usually pretty good assessors of our own strengths. We know in what circumstances we feel most comfortable and excel. But, perhaps you have some strengths that you don't see in yourself. This activity will help you find out.

Below are ten questions that I am going to ask you to email or copy and distribute to at least 3 friends. These should be true friends and not the type denoted in the story above. These need to be friends who will be tender with your feelings and are interested in your growth.

Some of these questions are similar to what you answered about yourself yesterday, but with a twist. See what you think of the questions. Again, I adapted these from Dr. Phil's great book, Self Matters: Creating Your Life from the Inside Out.

1. Please describe something that I consistently do well.

2. Please name one thing you have seen me do well.

3. Please tell me the best thing about how I look.

4. In as much detail as possible, can you remember any time that I seemed to be happiest?

5. Tell me what you think my strongest traits are.

6. If you were going to describe my best strengths with three words, what would they be?

7. If you were in a situation in which you thought I could help you in some way, what would that situation be?

8. Can you tell me any aspect you respect about me?

9. If you had to describe me as a car, what kind of car would I be? Why?

10. If you had to describe me as an animal, what kind of animal would I be? Why?

When I completed this exercise back in 2003, I sent this to my mother, one of my siblings, and two close friends. In some ways I was surprised by the responses and in other ways I was not surprised as all. I did receive some confirmations of the strengths that I knew I possessed.

However, I was surprised at a couple of the responses that I received. Others saw something in me that I didn't even see in myself. This was an important moment for me when I realized that maybe there was more to me than what my own self-assessments rendered.

I hope you will send this to 2 or 3 friends and ask for their honest feedback. I think it will be eye-opening. I would love for you to email me at jasfountain@gmail.com and let me know if this activity proved meaningful or not.

As I close out this mini-series, I hope that your take-away from this week is the story of the bucket filler. That simple story is a great metaphor for how to live a happy and successful life. 

QUESTION: Does it make you nervous to ask others to assess your strengths? Please leave comments below.

REACHING BACK TO MOVE FORWARD

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.”

Feather 1 by Jim Champion

 

This week we have been talking about being a bucket-filler and focusing on our strengths. Today, we take a step toward identifying more of our strengths.

I have recently read Jon Acuff’s inspiring book, Quitter. In his book, he says that finding our dreams in life is oftentimes an act of recovery – we have to go back to our younger version to re-discover our true passions and dreams.

I believe this is also the case to fully discover our strengths. As we grow older, it is like this wall gets built up around our “true” self – the self that once dreamed big dreams and had incredible hopes. By thinking back to our childhood we can rekindle those strengths and remember who we truly are.

As we work through this process of defining our strengths, we will take a 2-fold approach: 1) Rediscovering our younger selves; and 2) Defining who we are today. I am adapting these questions from Dr. Phil McGraw’s book, Self-Matters: Creating Your Life from the Inside Out.

Before we begin, I must make a confession. Most often, when I read books and the author asks me to write answers to questions or write out my reflections on a particular idea, I usually just think through the answers. However, the times that I have truly made progress and breakthroughs in my thinking have been those times when I’ve written out responses. There is just something magical about writing.

In reality, I know that most of you will probably not record the answers to these questions. So, please at least think through each of the questions in relation to your strengths. Even if you think you know your strengths, this activity might bring to mind some long-hidden virtues that could serve you as you move forward.

Here we go. 

The Good Ole Days 

1. I remember a particular time when I was especially happy, and it was…

2. One time that I felt really excited was when…

3. I remember times when a person said something to me or treated me in such a way that it made a positive difference in my life, and one of those times was when…

4. A time when I felt really special to someone was when I…

5. When I was younger, I always wanted to be…

6. I used to dream about myself as a … 

Who I Am Today 

1. I am very good when …

2. I think of myself as being …

3. I think my body is …

4. I am happiest when …

5. My greatest strengths are …

6. I am best in situations that …

7. I think I could be …

8. I fear …

9. What keeps me from being what I really want is …

10. In the future, I …

11. What keeps me going is …

12. If I described myself as a car, I would be …

13. If I described myself as an animal, I would be …

So, did you find any meaning in this exercise? Sometimes I think we grow through reflection and that is mainly what this piece is about.

I hope that you have gained some insight into your life through these questions. As I’ve related before, the right questions can give the right answers.

Tomorrow, we will turn the tables on this exercise and find out how others assess your strengths.

In the meantime, live today as a bucket-filler. Remember that each individual that we interact with today provides the opportunity for us to serve and uplift and make a difference! What greater opportunity could we ask for? 

QUESTION: Why is self-reflection such difficult work? Please post comments below.

FOCUS ON YOUR STRENGTHS

“Success is achieved by developing our strengths, 

not by eliminating our weaknesses”

~Marilyn vos Savant

 Perfect Blue by Lain Alexander

As shared in the introduction to the book How Full Is Your Bucket?, a Gallup poll conducted a randomized survey with more than a thousand employees. In this study, they asked the employees where their manager focused the most time and attention:

a. On employees’ strengths

b. On employees’ weaknesses

c. Neither of the above; the manager ignored employees

The surprising results of the survey were that “one person, specifically the manager in this context, can eliminate almost all of the active disengagement in a workplace if he or she primarily focuses on an employee’s strengths.”

When people reported that their manager ignored employees (neither focusing on strengths or weaknesses) there was a 40% chance of them being actively disengaged on the job.

If their manager focused on weaknesses (demonstrating that they were at least paying attention) there was only a 22% chance of them being disengaged.

But, when the manager focused on an employee’s strengths, there was just a 1% chance of that employee being very negative or actively disengaged on the job.

Does this surprise you? I mean, shouldn’t a leader help employees find their weaknesses and improve them? This feels counterintuitive to me and has caused me to reflect on this thought for several days.

As often happens, just as I began thinking on this idea, a serendipitous moment occurred. Michael Hyatt posted a short 3-minute video by Andy Stanley relating to this exact topic. Watch it below before we continue.

My take-aways from Andy’s talk: 

1. Your fully exploited strengths are of far greater value to your current organization than your marginally improved weaknesses.
2. Your weaknesses will always be weaknesses in comparison to your strengths.
3. The way for you to develop an incredible organization is to create space for the members in your organization to fully exploit their strengths and help them delegate their weaknesses to people for whom those weaknesses are actually strengths. 

When I look at my own life, I know that I possess certain strengths which are just natural strengths for me. I also know that my areas of weakness will never reach the heights of my strengths no matter how much I work on them. 

By the way, I don’t think that we should ignore our weaknesses and make excuses for them. I want to do better with my weaknesses. But, I know that the majority of my focus should be on utilizing those strengths with which I have been blessed.

In an effort to embrace this idea of focusing on my strengths, I am going to help you and me focus on our strengths for the next two days. Tomorrow, we will assess our strengths and the next day we will allow others to assess our strengths.

These exercises can prove valuable in helping us to become more effective leaders and managers of others and of ourselves.

QUESTION: What kind of boss do you have? Does he/she focus on your strengths, weaknesses, or just ignore you altogether? Please post comments below.

ARE YOU A BUCKET FILLER?

“Everybody can be great. Because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and your verb agree to serve.... You don't have to know the second theory of thermodynamics in physics to serve. You only need a heart full of grace. A soul generated by love. ”

~Martin Luther King, Jr.

 bucket by rubyblossom

If you follow my blog, you know that last week was the most non-productive week of blogging that I have had since I began blogging in April. There is always an excuse, but with school starting back in my district this past week, I have been working insane hours and was unable to write. I’m okay with that.

The beginning of school went very well. One of the aspects of this school year that I am most proud of is the fact that we are implementing The Leader in Me. I’ve written about this program on my blog before (here and here), but we teach our 2^nd and 3^rd graders the 7 habits of highly effective people by Stephen Covey. Additionally, every other school in the district is also implementing this program. I believe that this process will change our entire community over the next 5-10 years.

We typically have a theme for our school year. Last year, it was 212 degrees – one degree can make all the difference. This year our theme is “Have You Filled a Bucket Today?” We are basing this theme on the children’s book: Have You Filled a Bucket Today? - A Guide to Daily Happiness for Kids.” It made me very happy to walk into classrooms last week and witness this concept being explained to children.

The adult version of this concept is entitled How Full Is Your Bucket? by Tom Rath and Donald O. Clifton. Early in the book the authors explain the concept:

“Each of us has an invisible bucket. It is constantly emptied or filled, depending on what others say or do to us. When our bucket is full, we feel great. When it's empty, we feel awful.

Each of us also has an invisible dipper. When we use that dipper to fill other people's buckets -- by saying or doing things to increase their positive emotions -- we also fill our own bucket. But when we use that dipper to dip from others' buckets -- by saying or doing things that decrease their positive emotions -- we diminish ourselves.

Like the cup that runneth over, a full bucket gives us a positive outlook and renewed energy. Every drop in that bucket makes us stronger and more optimistic.

But an empty bucket poisons our outlook, saps our energy, and undermines our will. That's why every time someone dips from our bucket, it hurts us.

So we face a choice every moment of every day: We can fill one another's buckets, or we can dip from them. It's an important choice -- one that profoundly influences our relationships, productivity, health, and happiness.”

This is such a simple concept that is so applicable to life. I fully believe if we would walk around each day thinking about this simple concept that the world would be a better place in which to live.

Think about the “bucket fillers” in your life. What makes them special and unique?

For the remainder of this week, I am going to take a concept from “How Full is Your Bucket?” and expound upon it. This idea is focusing on your strengths.

Today I challenge you to be a “bucket filler.” Consciously choose to fill other people’s buckets this week and determine if it truly does make you feel more positive, optimistic and happy. 

QUESTION: Do you know a “bucket filler?” What makes them special? Please post comments below.

SHIFT THE MONKEY

** Last week, I attended the Differentiated Instruction Conference in Las Vegas. This week, I will be sharing what I learned from the conference. Although the conference is for educators, the ideas that I will share can be applied to your life. **

Funny Face Making by Petr Kratochvil 

Todd Whitaker is a rock star!

I have previously read a couple of his books (What Great Teachers Do Differently, What Great Principals Do Differently, Seven Simple Secrets: What the BEST Teachers Know and Do!), but when I heard him in person at the Administrator’s Summit last Monday, he blew me away.

He was engaging, funny, and a dynamite speaker. The title of his presentation was “Shifting Your Monkey.” The presentation was so practical that it could be applied to all areas of life.

The thesis of the presentation was this: Why do good people “take on the monkey” when bad people act inappropriately? His presentation was about shifting the "monkey" (ownership of the issue) to the people who deserve it and taking it off of those who don't.

How do you do this? First, start by treating all people as if they were good. One example that he used to demonstrate this idea involved two parallel scenarios. 

How do we typically respond when we see the two worst kids in school walking down the hall? We say, “What are you doing out here?” Essentially, we are treating them as if they are up to no good. 

Next, think about what we typically say when we see the future valedictorian and salutatorian walking down the hallway. Nobody belittles them or treats them as if they were bad. We usually say, “How are you doing today?”

Todd offered a much better option as to what we should say in either situation: “Hi, can I help you?” That is how you treat people as if they were good.

After we let this idea of "treating all people as if they were good" sink into our mind, then, ask these questions:

1. Where is the monkey?

2. Where should the monkey be?

3. How do we shift the monkey?

This is an idea that is much simpler in theory than in practice, but he gave many examples of how to do this as an administrator.

One example that he used involved a high school basketball game. Have you ever attended a game and the one fan is yelling and screaming and generally acting inappropriate? When this happens, who has the monkey? Not the crazy guy - it's everyone around him.

So, what should the administrator do? (Hint: Don't stand on the side and stare at him!) The administrator should walk up and sit down beside the man. This immediately takes the monkey off the good people in the stands - they are relieved. When you sit down, it shifts the monkey. 

Remember, treat everyone as if they are good. So, don't sit down and feel like you must address the situation. Simply talk to the man and get to know him. Maybe it's the first time he's ever seen his niece/nephew play and he doesn't realize how crazy he is acting.

Regardless, you have shifted the monkey away from the good people and made everyone more comfortable.

Again, this idea is simple in theory, but somewhat counterintuitive. I hope he writes a book about this principle at some point. I need an audio copy of the keynote to listen to many times to try and sink this idea into my mind.

Besides this big idea, Todd offered many other nuggets. I mention a few below:

• An ineffective teacher has an inordinate number of ineffective parents.
• Every teacher does the best they know how. 
• Ineffective people do not know how others perceive them. 
• Great principals teach the teachers. 
• There is nothing wrong with being afraid. The problem is acting afraid. 
• Adults pout because it works. 
• Ignoring is a choice (I wrote about this last week). 
• It’s always easier to not deal with something today. 
• Great principals have faculty meetings that teachers value and look forward to attending. 
• Avoidance is not a strategy. 
• Be the aggressor; but, never be aggressive. 
• All actions in dealing with teachers, parents, or students are about future behavior.

I have two more pages of notes from this session, but I’ll leave you with one more gem. If you supervise others, you know that when you deal with a negative behavior, most people have an excuse or offer any number of other reactions. When addressing a challenging behavior, Todd suggested this statement: “I was just telling you because I would want to know.” That is inarguable. That statement is the first step of shifting the monkey. The ball is now in their court.

This was powerful information that is just as applicable to living as to educating young people. Read back over the bullet list above and think about how these ideas fit in with your work.

If you are an educator, you need to read Todd Whitaker’s stuff – it’s very powerful. In fact, you can follow him on Twitter (@ToddWhitaker).

QUESTION: Do any of these ideas resonate with you?

COMMUNICATE LIKE BOBBY BOWDEN

“Winning coaches always remember that there is only one foot difference between a halo and a noose.”

~Bobby Bowden

If you’ve read my “About Me” page, you know that I’ve traveled a circuitous route from my time in the classroom to my current position as an Assistant Principal. Between these two jobs, I took a 7 year detour through the academic side of college athletics.

I spent a year working at Mississippi State, three years at Florida State University, and two and a half years at Louisiana State University. At FSU and LSU, I had the good fortune of working with football and two of the finest coaches in college football, Bobby Bowden and Les Miles.

I will share some of my experiences from that time of my life in future posts, but today I wanted to focus on one of the characteristics that made Bobby Bowden such a successful man and coach.

Working in academic support for student-athletes was probably the most challenging work that I have ever been involved with in my life. At FSU, I basically served as the academic advisor for the offensive football players. This meant that I advised them on classes to take, monitored their progress in the classes, and set up tutors to work with them throughout the semester.

One aspect of monitoring their progress in class involved corresponding with professors. We basically wanted the professors to know who we were and that we would be checking up on the athletes. 99% of the professors were grateful for our involvement and were glad to keep us in the “loop” on class progress.

During football season, one of my favorite activities was hosting guest coaches. Early in the week, we would invite a couple of professors to come to practice on Thursday and be our guest at the game on Saturday. This was meant as a way to expose the professors to the rigors and challenges of what student-athletes actually experience.

On Thursdays, we would give the professors a tour of the academic support facility and then head over to the football position meetings. I would take the professors into the meetings and watch the coaches reviewing film with their players. The professors were universally impressed with the knowledge the athletes had to attain to understand the nomenclature of the sport.

After the team meetings, we would go in and spend about 10-15 minutes with Coach Bowden. This was always the highlight of the guest coaches’ experience and the purpose of this blog.

The greatest lesson that I learned about life from working with Coach Bowden was the power of communication. Besides being a genius coach, Coach Bowden was a master communicator. I do not use this term lightly. He was incredibly genuine, funny, and always charming. I believe this is one of the legacies of his tenure as a football coach.

During these brief meetings with the professors, Coach Bowden nearly always made a personal connection with the professors – the first lesson of communication he taught me. I was amazed at how many times Coach Bowden was able to link mutual friends throughout the process. He would crack jokes and always put the professors at ease.

Another lesson I learned about communication from Coach Bowden was the art of listening. These professors would walk into Coach Bowden’s office a bit unsure of how he would act. Coach Bowden would quickly put the professors at ease by asking them to tell him about themselves. As the professors talked, Coach Bowden connected by being an attentive listener. He would ask questions and show genuine interest in their lives.

Finally, I learned that communication is not about me. The power of the meetings with Coach Bowden and the professors was that Coach Bowden made each visitor feel important. Here was Coach Bowden (at that time the winningest coach in major college football) not talking a bit about himself, but focusing on the other people. This was a very powerful lesson.

When our brief meeting with Coach Bowden was completed, the professors were always deeply grateful for the time he shared with them. These meetings were powerful reminders of the art of communication and why this skill is so important.

As I move through life, I will never forget the communication lessons that I learned from Coach Bowden. I believe we can all be more effective communicators if we focus on connecting, listening, and focusing on the other person.

QUESTION: Who has taught you powerful communications lessons in your life? Please leave comments below.

A TRIBUTE TO MY DAD

Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

~Proverbs 22:6

Hugh Fountain (daddy) and Jason - 1977

I often joke with my dad about all the things that I “inherited” from him. 

For example, about the time that I hit 30 years of age, my doctor told me that I had high Uric Acid. This is an inherited trait and both of my brothers share this with our dad as well. Thanks, dad! 

If you asked my wife, she would tell you that when I am upset or frustrated that I tend to become very quiet and conversation is difficult. If you ask my mom about my dad, she’ll tell you the same thing about him. Thanks, dad! 

If you came into my house, you would soon know that my wife hung every picture and has completed pretty much all of the “handy” work in our home. I was just not gifted in being a handyman. Thanks, dad! 

Finally, I began wearing glasses in the 7^th grade. Without my glasses, now, I can’t see across the room. I share my dad’s eyesight. Thanks, again! 

But, as I think about life, the true measure of a man and a father is what he teaches his children. Below are the things that I’ve really inherited from my dad: 

Love for family.

I have two older brothers and two older sisters. My dad has always taught us to value family. When our family comes together for holidays or other occasions, it is always joyous. There is a peace and harmony when our family is together. My dad has always nurtured that spirit. 

Love for Jesus. 
As I grew up, church was a non-negotiable. If it was Sunday, we were in church. But, my dad didn’t just haul us to church on Sunday and forget about it the rest of the week. I remember vividly as a kid having family devotional before we went to bed. Imagine the chaos of trying to keep five children focused on a devotional. 

One indelible image that is in my mind from my childhood is seeing my dad on his knees praying. What a lesson this was for me. There is power in a little boy seeing his dad pray. This taught me from an early age that life isn’t about me. 

Love for others. 
My dad has lived a life of helping other people. He is truly one of the most tender-hearted, loving people that I’ve ever known. My dad has never turned his back on another person in need. And he has always done this with humility. 

Support. 
My dad has always provided unwavering support for me and my ventures. Whether it was going off to college or moving to Mississippi or Florida or Louisiana, he has always been behind me 100%. I know this has helped me make tough decisions. When you know that you have family supporting and backing you, it makes risk-taking a bit easier. 

The importance of a daddy loving his son’s mother. 
My parents have been married for over 50 years and I can say without reservation that my dad has ALWAYS loved my mother unconditionally. As a child, there is power in knowing that your parents love each other. As a boy, you respect your dad so much more when you see him loving and respecting your mother. 

On this Father’s Day, the biggest compliment that I can pay my dad is that his life has always pointed me to God. I’m proud to be a Fountain and I’m proud to be my father’s son. I love you, dad, and I thank you for ALL the gifts you’ve given me over the course of my life. Happy Father’s Day!

Question: What did you "inherit" from your father? Please leave comments below.

MANAGING PEOPLE THE DISNEY WAY

**** This week I will be writing about four life experiences that had a huge impact on my life. ****

"I only hope that we don't lose sight of one thing - that it was all started by a mouse." ~Walt Disney

photo © 2008 Casey Fleser | more info (via: Wylio)

After my first year of teaching back in 1996, I decided that I needed to have a new life experience. So, I moved to Orlando, Florida, for the summer and worked at Disney World. This short, seven-week stint was an eye-opening experience for me. Not only did I learn a bit about the magic behind WDW, but I also learned a valuable lesson about managing people.

I worked in Merchandising in Fantasyland at the Magic Kingdom. For those of you familiar with WDW, this is the area just behind the castle. For most of my days, I worked on the Stromboli Hat Cart next to Lumiere’s Restaurant. I enjoyed this assignment as business was always brisk and I was able to be outside. The volume of sales that this small cart at WDW does in a day is unbelievable!

I have several stories from my days at WDW that I might share in future posts, but in this post I want to relate one of the best lessons that I ever learned about managing and motivating employees.

Each evening after the park closed, the manager of Fantasyland merchandising would hold a debriefing session  with all merchandising employees to review the days budget and whether or not we had met our goal. This, in itself, was a powerful exercise. We felt like a part of WDW because we were in the “know.” I loved the fact that they shared this information with employees.

On a typical day during the summer, our budget would be around $90,000 (this was only the merchandising area of Fantasyland). So, in the evening, the manager would say, “Our budget for today was $87, 450. We actually hit $91,257. Great job!” Then, he would ask if anyone had challenges during the day or any issues that he should know about. This was a very powerful exercise.

My story takes place in the middle of my time at WDW. It had rained off and on for a week straight and we sold a load of ponchos (no one EVER brings ponchos with them to WDW). So, each evening when we met for debrief we would crush the budget by $15,000 or so.

When we met that Friday evening for our debrief, the managers had brought carts of hotdogs, fries, drinks, and Mickey Mouse ice cream bars for everyone. They told us that this was in celebration for our hard work.

In actuality, we knew the wet days had contributed to our sales, but it did not matter. You would have thought they gave all of us a check for $1,000. We were whooping it up and high-fiving and generally excited. The managers were pumping us up and just being super appreciative.

We knew we had made WDW a load of extra money that week and they had spent next to nothing on buying us junk food. But, again, it did not matter. They did something for us and we LOVED it.

I’ve never forgotten this lesson. If you are in a position of leadership (and we are ALL leaders – if you’ve forgotten read this), you need to say thank-you for the hard work that others do. A seemingly small amount of recognition can go a long way.

What can you do today to encourage others? Stop focusing on what you can’t do for others and focus on what you can do.

Question: Have you had experiences similar to this? Please post comments below.

A SUBTLE ACTION

**** This week I will be writing about four life experiences that had a huge impact on my life. ****

Do we fully realize the power of our actions? This story embodies the quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson: “Who you are speaks so loudly I can’t hear what you are saying.”

I taught middle school math for seven years before heading off to become an academic counselor at the college level. During these seven years, I was fortunate to have a wonderful mentor at my middle school. His name was Johnny Cabaniss.

When I first arrived at Bay Minette Middle School, Coach Cabaniss was the assistant principal. By the time I left, he was the principal. He is now the principal at Baldwin County High School.

For some reason, Coach Cabaniss took me under his wing from the time I arrived at BMMS until the time I left. He had unwavering support for me and taught me many lessons that I’ll never forget. One such lesson occurred the day before school started one of my last years at BMMS.

As any educator can attest, the days leading up to the start of school are exciting and stressful at the same time. Much organization is needed to prepare classrooms and be ready for the moment when a new crop of students come through the door.

This particular afternoon, I had been working all day to have my room ready. The assistant principal at the time was in charge of textbooks and the textbooks should have been in our rooms at least a week earlier. Well, we had just received our books that morning and all of the teachers were stressed trying to write names in the books and have them prepared for the students.

Coach Cabaniss came by my room that afternoon just to check on me and determine how things were coming along. The minute he walked in, I unloaded on him. I complained, fussed, and generally lamented the process of distributing textbooks. I was definitely out of line in acting this way toward my principal, but I was just out of patience. Have you ever had those moments where you say things to almost “pick” a fight? That’s where I was at that moment.

I think I actually wanted to have an argument with Coach Cabaniss. At the very least, I wanted a reaction. But, thankfully, he didn’t take the bait.

What Coach Cabaniss did next was something that I’ll never forget.

Without so much as a word of condemnation toward my attitude, Coach Cabaniss simply sat down and started helping me with my textbooks. This subtle gesture meant more to me than any advice or words that Coach could have given to me at that time.

Coach Cabaniss’ actions that day entrenched my loyalty for him. This was not some premeditated action on his part. This was, simply, him responding to my need at that moment. What a lesson he taught me that day.

Are we living intentionally today? Are we focused on the moment and responding to what needs to be done right now? My challenge for you and myself today is to seek out teachable moments like these. Of course, to be a man or woman of action (not just words) we must be internally prepared to respond in a proper manner when moments like this arrive.

Question: What subtle action by another person impacted you? Please post comments below.

CREATING MOMENTUM

“A journey of a thousand miles starts with that first step. If you look ahead to the end, and all the weary miles between, with all the dangers you might face, you might never take that first step. And whatever it is you want to achieve in life, if you don’t make the effort, you won’t reach your goal. So take that first step. There will be many challenges. You might get knocked back – but in the end, you will make it. Good luck.”

-Sir Richard Branson, Screw It, Let’s Do It! 

 

Every time I read the quote above by Richard Branson, my blood begins pumping a little faster and my palms become a little sweaty. The quote resonates so strongly with me because I have to remember this quote any time I begin a new endeavor. If I focus on all of the steps to reaching a goal, I become overwhelmed and never seem to gain traction.

I have written before about how being a leader is just as much about how you lead yourself as how you lead others. Leading yourself is about living an intentional life – one by design. Life is too short, too meaningful, and too open to possibilities to coast through the days.

One thing is certain – if you don’t begin working toward a goal you are assured that you will never achieve it. There are many books and blogs that you can read about the process of goal-setting, but below is a simple 4-step process for beginning your work on a new goal.

1. Take out a blank piece of paper (notebook, printer paper, really anything will do)

2. Write the goal at the top of the page (lose 10 pounds, communicate more effectively with my wife, eat healthier, reconnect with old friends, etc)

3. For one minute, brainstorm any small, tiny activity that you could do to move toward that goal.

4. For the next week, commit to completing one of the activities that you brainstormed each day.

This activity is a momentum builder. The key is in taking very small steps each day.

One small step today, then another tomorrow, and another the next day, and you will establish momentum to reach your goal.

One of my favorite quotes is from Steven Pressfield’s inspiring book, The War of Art. If you create art of any kind, you must read this book. In the first chapter, he says: "There's a secret that real writers know that wannabe writers don't and the secret is this: it's not the writing part that's hard. What's hard is sitting down to write.”

Life is full of distractions and, oftentimes, the hardest part of reaching a goal is beginning. Take the first step!

What do you want to accomplish? Please do not wait until tomorrow to begin. Begin today…right now. It’s too important to put off!

Please post comments below.